My day began simply enough. I had to work this morning on staff, not in my usual mole-hole. It's not too bad. There is a good set of girls. We work well together and get it done. I moved along to the next phase of my day... prepping dinner.
Well, I had to stop for gas on the way home. I went to Wawa (which is like a 7-11 to those of you not residing in the Garden State). I hate Wawa. I have not been inside one in probably six years now. Let me rephrase it...I hate the SMELL of Wawa. It is something I believe they have piped in to each and every store: somewhat of a hot pickle juice; wet but smoldering menthol cigarette combined with a hint of old palm sweat and just a smattering of curdled dairy product baked neatly inside an old rag mop in the blazing summer sun. This "fragrance" goes way beyond refreshing or forgettable. Anyway, I stopped and whimpered for a fill up at well over $3.25 per gallon. The kid flips the switch and continues (without acknowledging me) to yap with his peeps. The pump shuts itself off and he hands the receipt to me...it's way too cheap. He's only filled half the tank but he is immune to any explanation or request because his gum chewing and lip smacking is drowning me out; not to mention his buds shouting over the music that plays. Not a big deal, I move on.
To the grocery store I go. And HOOOOOOWWWW much do I like the grocery store? Well, I confess that I would rather wear a beard of bees. It is a screaming nightmare, but I want to try a new recipe and need some things. I foolishly believe I will pop in and out and be on my merry way unscathed; foolish woman. They have rearranged the store...AGAIN! JUST STOP IT! Leave the breadcrumbs with the stuffing. No one will think less of you if the canned tomatoes are the segway from green beans to fruit cocktail....And why oh WHY in the name of all that is Holy do you need to put Parmesan cheese in three different places? But I find what I need and march to the register avoiding the self-checkout because LAST time, I had to remove the bag I re-packed three times like the machine asked only to have it yell at me to put it back, screaming for "Head Cashier" who had to page the deli-man to override my purchase. In front of me are two women, the first is arguing about the size of her cereal box and the number of times she can use her coupon and savings card. The woman directly in front of me lifts all her items, shoves passed me (think about how narrow the space is between the register belt and the candy racks) muttering "This is NUTS!" and goes to self check out. "Danger Will Robinson DANGER!!! " But I hold my ground. I wait and wait and wait. Finally "Coupon Katie" gets her way and saunters out. The poor register clerk looks so very sad and tired. I try to smile, get rung up and head out. And by the way? That woman who shoved passed me? She is placing and re-placing her bag on the self check out shelf while it tells her to repack her stuff and the deli-guy has a smoke outside next to the flowers for sale. Good one. Those pansies are gonna smell like Wawa.....
I drive home and sing. The top is down on my car, it's going to be okay. I park, walk into the garage and stop short. There is a HUGE bumble bee lying in the middle of the floor upside down. If you ask me, it's as big as my foot. I back away so as not to disturb the fierce beast, close the garage door and enter through the front of the house. But my belief in Karma is too strong so I head BACK to the garage and think I'll be the best person ever if I help this bee. I nudge it with my foot to turn it over and the thing clenches on and flips upright...onto my foot with a grip that said "Thanks! I'm going to sting the living Hell out of you until you bloat with toxin" (All bees say this to me). I scream like a thousand banshees, arms flailing and kick my shoe right out the door. Almost sobbing, I hobble after it and beat it with my remaining shoe until it is satisfactorily ground into my driveway. I am on my hands and knees, grunting with every swing until there is nothing left. Absolutely nothing.
Forget it, we're having pancakes: prepping for dinner was just too draining.
Enjoy your night. Thanks for stopping in.
