I had something else ready to go, but this one butted right in front of it.
My daughter came home yesterday in tears. Her little chest just hitching up and down, her shoulders sagging...her heart hurt. Tears sprung in my eyes and I dropped my mail to hold her. "What? What's going on?"
I could hear the lump in her throat and the ache reached right into me. My lips trembled and I hugged tighter. I picked up my daughter and carried her to the rocking chair I used to sit in when she was six pounds and safe from hurt. I rocked her and I felt the weight of her world. I was so sad to feel how very heavy it was. we sat quietly for a long time. In fact, I thought she was asleep.
She wiped her nose on my shirt and pulled away and it all spilled out in a rush. My ten year old's heartache? She had been asked to a dance and although she really wanted to go with this boy, her friends had called him a geek, a nerd. I smiled and tried to think.
"Oh Honey, your daddy's a geek." is how it began,but I started over. So for a while, we talked. No. She talked. She talked about how she'd known him since first grade and they were really good friends and he was funny and nice to her. They had a lot in common...at ten years old I don't really know what that means besides having some of the same Disney movies or liking pizza. I don't think Sarah Palin or the stock market are critical deal breakers when it comes time to choose a lunch buddy.
She was frustrated by her friends (who had not been asked yet OR who had said no to previous offers). I tried to go around the "mean girl" thing. I tried to point out just how HARD it is to ask a girl out...and then put on top of it that people call this kid a 'geek'? I asked her what he thought his chances were of getting a date....but she saw him for who he was. The two of them would have a wonderful time. They were going as friends and who cared anyway....I had all the adult answers but I was really struggling to convert them over and although I remember those days and my heartaches at that age (His name was Eric) it's different now. Besides, she'd never believe me. I hugged her, wiped her tears and tried to make it okay. I did my best to give those little bits of me that I had put away with my dolls, we had our first boy cry.
Ben had been sitting on the sofa listening and teasing the dog with his Fruit Roll-up. He was half-bouncing half-rocking on the edge of the cushion and quietly said; "Screw-em. Wait til DAD finds out!"
I stopped rocking in the chair. Maddie turned and got up. She hugged her brother and with a small, wise smile said "Thanks."
They proceeded to steal two cookies and went out side to play.
This was God's warning shot over the bow of my little "Life" Boat....it's COMING!!! Our boat rocked and waves were a little high, but we made it through. I don't know if I did it right. I quite honestly don't know what I'm doing. I just know I'd do anything to protect her (them) and the most important thing she has: her heart.
I'll get there....
